I’m regularly described as ‘shy’, ‘introverted’, or ‘quiet’ by people who know me ‘irl’. Generally, I just nod and shrug, but recently I took a few minutes to ponder if that’s accurate. Am I? Do I avoid talking to others? Do I prefer to be alone? Do I disappear into the background by choice? The answer to all of these, generally, is no. Why, then, am I labelled so?
Granted, it’s difficult to self-analyze, but I do have a theory. My theory is that I really don’t like eye contact (not a theory, actually true), and most of the rest of you do like it (the theory part). I can give a speech to crowded room, no problem. I can argue online for hours. I can argue IN PERSON, for hours, but preferably while I’m staring at a computer. I just don’t want to soul-lock with everyone. Is that so wrong?
Seriously, eye-huggers out there, what do you get from that? (Is it ok to call you eye-huggers? Good. Moving on.)
Being Non-eye-hugging (or Nuggen, as I think we should adorably shorten the term) has created a lot of problems for me over the years. You name it; dating, job interviews, and even pulling into traffic, are all heavily eye contact dependent.
Why do you do it? Why do you freakin’ DEMAND it? Do you really think the evil humans will crack under the warm sunshine of your eyeballing? Do you think you will instantly decipher their secret plot by noting whether they look up and to the left. (Be honest, you don’t really check which way they look up, anyway.) Why? Why? Why?
I don’t know why I don’t want play eye pong with you. I just don’t. I want to stare at my phone, my screen, my shoes, that bird, your eyebrow, anything else really…
*sigh* I’ll just go sit by myself now.
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